No, okay, it wasn’t an on-stage firing. But here’s how things started: my boyfriend and I went to Vegas this weekend, most notably to spend the weekend in Vegas, but also to see the last show of the Lights in the Sky over North America tour 2008. On the plane, we couldn’t seem to stop conjecture over what Trent and Co. might do or say or play at the sure-to-be-legendary show.

Moi: Maybe Trent will evolve into On-Stage Firings. Like “Alessandro, you’re fired.” “Whaaat?”

See, we have this little thing we did all weekend to mimic Trent Reznor, which is holding an imaginary mic really close to your mouth, looking around intensely, and speaking in a soft but terrifying tone. Somehow this was really funny to me, so I didn’t think it any big deal to be joking about Alessandro getting kicked out of the band. Ha ha, ho ho, hee hee, I thought. Josh Fucking Freese is already leaving on Saturday, no way that will ever happen. ~*MY FAVORITE MEMBER IS SAFE*~

LET IT NEVER BE SAID THAT I AM NOT A TEMPTER OF FATE.

So, let’s see. Aside from the star-studded but slightly confusing crowd (Vegas party-goers in full cocktail-party wear, Ron Jeremy, Avril Lavigne, A Perfect Circle bandmembers…), kickass showmanship, a representation of true-blue and energetic fans, and wicked music, what else happened? Oh yeah, it was announced that Alessandro’s leaving. D: D: D: D: D: D: Nooooooo, come back zinc! This is what I get for making so many Italian jokes at his expense.

But I’m not entirely here to whine and moan about The Cortini flying the coop – I mean, he’ll no doubt be continuing his music, and as I’m already a huge fucking modwheelmood fan I couldn’t be happier. Besides, I just saw NIN in Vegas, baby! Here are a few highlights:

The Great Destroyer: I had told Kevin time and time again that if they played The Great Destroyer I would, without a doubt, squeal like a little girl. I’d not seen it on the tour yet this year and it was the song I most wanted to behold in all its live glory. Sure enough, when the song began, I grabbed him and jumped up and down in our fifth row seats making slightly bird-like noises. What an amazing fucking song. Being center of a close row really helped, too. This set-up was beyond anything an arena could offer, allowing the seated audience to see the light show in all its intended glory. The Great Destroyer was meant to be seen like this. Two BSOD’s were caught by our eyes. The bootleg live recordings of this song do not do it justice in any capacity. The instrumentation was phenomenal. Lo! I am fulfilled.

No The Wretched: Noooooooooooooo. WTF!!!!?? I’ve seen it once this tour, though, so I’m not as pissed as I would be if I’d never seen it. Still, the transition from The Frail into Closer was sort of anti-climactic. I understand that noobs had to be in the audience, but seriously? We’ve all seen Closer before. A lot. We know. You want to fuck me like an animal, we knooooooowwwww. Secretly in my heart of hearts I was hoping for a Frail/Wretched/We’re In This Together Now trifecta as has never been heard, but I suppose the Gods of Setlists decided “nah, we’ll just get rid of Alessandro instead, you greedy bitch.” ;_;

Some Really Interesting Outros: I was especially intrigued by Discipline - the poppy breakdown at the end was full-on disco and I can’t wait to hear it again on someone’s HD recording.

Trent Getting Chatty: Keep in mind that ‘chatty’ for Trent pretty much means “said more than ten words”. His speech at the end was not only edifying but genuinely emotional. It’s good to know that Nine Inch Nails will be reforming, that changes will be occurring, and that more tour dates are forthcoming in the new year. But what really intrigued us (besides the “Big Fucking Titties” callback) was the statement by Trent that he was “working on some stuff he’s not supposed to talk about yet” (I paraphrase). This makes my eyebrows quirk, as Trent is sans label and usually media blackouts involve contracts. Hmmmmmm. I want to believe that HBO is involved somehow and all we exhibit24.net peeps might get our Year Zero miniseries after all. I can dream. Also, that Trent Reznor is a class act.

Holy Shit Alessandro Just Threw His Keyboard: HOLY SHIT ALESSANDRO THREW HIS KEYBOARD INTO THE PIT. SOME FAN HAS THAT SHIT RIGHT NOW.

OTHER THINGS ALESSANDRO CONSIDERED THROWING INTO THE AUDIENCE:

1. Tour bus

2. His underwear (they’re his and they’ve gotta be stylish).

3. Delicious cake

4. Hope

5. Pelle

ETS-ers In the Hizzouse: Hannah Montana and Friend, you rock. Even if Hannah Montana (not the Hannah Montana – he was wearing a bright pink HM t-shirt, one of which he’d also purchased for ETS luminary Torgo) was very very drunk. It’s fun to sit next to fun people who don’t want to cut themselves.

Picto-chatting During the Opening Act: Which sucked.

Farewell, Freese. Farewell, Alessandro. You shall both be missed in the NIN-world. The show fucked my shit up right good, though. Great job.